Wrapping YOUR 2017

Winter is not my favorite season. Not. At. All. I think it’s my Nebraskan Roots, shout out to Omaha, Nebraska and all my family and friends there (please hold your Belly references, I don’t like that ish). I grew up in negative degree temps, experienced real live blizzards and snow storms that believe it or not, we still had to go to work and school in. Picture Rudy Huxtable (Cosby Show) in that full body snowsuit… yeah, that was my Omaha winterlife. Taking extra time to escape that suits evil clutches, and boots, hat/face mask and gloves….and then put the whole still damp bunch on at the end of the day to walk home. Thank God we were only a block away! Charlotte winters are pretty iffy. I will sign up all day for those random warm stints the QC loves to give us. The car wash’s packed, people out and about enjoying spring-like temps during our “winters”. It’s those constant stretches of gray skies, cold rains and ice that make this Rose wither and retreat to my home for safety and warmth. The city SHUTS DOWN and all the Northerners call us weak, wack and whatnot, tell us how we can’t drive in this weather – then proceed to go out and usually wreck. #SorryNotSorry.

But I digress…

I’m gonna spare you my bellyaching winter woes, because truth told- I am so very THANKFUL for living life, prospering and the exciting year to come. This year has been a tumultuous one for me and mine, but we learned from our mistakes and hopefully will know enough to grow from them and not repeat them. It’s the repetition of those same old mistakes that get a lot of people. We are human, we will undoubtedly make mistakes in this thing we call life, its how we learn from those mistakes, use them as tools to grow from and learn with. Trial and error are just a way of life and sometimes the sooner you embrace those failures, learn from them and move on, the better off you are and the closer you place yourself to your success.

If social media has taught me nothing else, it has shown me that I should never place my life scale or progress next to someone else’s. We are not in a race against each other in life and we all travel independent paths towards our own destiny. Never let yourself feel you are not enough, or aren’t far along enough in where you think you should be. Whether in work, life or home; others paths aren’t laid out for you to tread on. You blaze the singular trail of your very own feature film that is your life. You’re the STAR. In every movie, you see, the main character drudges through the worst of the worst, gets a win only to find they’re knocked on their asses again, desolate and penniless before the big turn-around and they come back stronger than ever after pulling into themselves, starting from the beginning if necessary to ultimately come out on top. The difference between you and that scenario is it is set in a two hour frame that most likely took months or years to come to fruition. So if you are actually doing this thing called life, it’s a process. We’ll have ups and downs; feel like a winner, then a loser, then like a winner again. Its not uncommon, and a lot of people go through it…I don’t care how much they fake it til they make it. My point is, win and lose – it’s a part of the process that is necessary to write your story. How bland would you be if shit always went your way, how much would you then appreciate the wins? I’m not applauding losses or stumbling blocks- but I’d be silly to say they don’t factor into the depth of your story. All of the media outlets allow us to show others how “great” we are, how good life is going, how sexy our “bae” is and how good that dinner was you created and smashed. You have a few post-ers that like to share their woes to wallow in, but for the most part- its show-n-tell the adult version. But you’ll always have those that say…I know her in real life and she is fake, or something along those lines. But the precedent has already been set and you chalk them up to be “hating” or something like that. When all you can see is someone else’s win as your loss you’ve already lost the battle. Let those others’ wins be your motivation to continue your own grind, not a measure of where your success stands. It will never ever be apples to apples. Your victory is your own to claim and once you receive it, you can claim it free and clear of muddling it up with a comparison to someone else’s win.

I’m so very exited about what 2018 will bring. I’m not really a resolutions girl, but I’ll resolve to living within my purpose while here on this earth. I resolve to being kinder to others and loving more! I resolve to stop stopping myself because of fears of achieving and embracing the blessings that are placed before me. My eldest son graduates high school this year and I am so very proud of the young man he has become. My youngest never ceases to amaze me with the size of his heart and the smile he keeps on his face. I am blessed already beyond measure, so it’s my plan to make my family proud of my accomplishments by seeing my own goals and aspirations come to fruition.

As you close our your 2017, I implore you to look back, but only very briefly…not to pick apart the good and bad decisions of the year, but as a chance to reflect on how to improve yourself and where you see yourself going forward. How you should be inspired by those who you’ve admired this past year and to use that admiration towards your own development. When you can, give back to others. We are here to help each other as a human race to succeed. Old heads, don’t clown the younger generation for their likes/dislikes as you were once the youngin. Young people do not close your ears to insightful words of wisdom from your elders who have already gone through what you’re experiencing now. Ladies, believe in yourselves, love yourselves despite any bad experiences you may have endured in your past (if any) and choose to not hold that against your future. Men, recognize the power women hold is not between their legs, but in our ability to love unconditionally. Learn to support and uplift your sisters and watch them reciprocate like nobody’s business. Men, you are the tone-setters, walk in your path and truths as you see fit. Be knowledgeable and do not fear growth and who you are!

If you’ve ever wondered why I close my articles with “LOVE love”, it’s simply because I actually love the action of loving others. To see it, give and get it, is my life’s mission. Love is a powerful tool that is tossed around sometimes like yesterdays news when in reality it is our future, our mainstay and how we function as a species on this earth. While hate makes its way around the globe sporadic and unpredictably, love is a constant. Love is the answer, the key and all you need. Some may think I’m chasin butterflies with that sentiment, but I choose to LOVE them anyway!

So….please be safe and responsible ringing in the New Year, and I cannot wait to “see” you all back next year! Many positive moves are being made for 2018 and I for one am ecstatic, have a Happy New Year, do YOU and for the last time of 2017, LOVE love!

~Teka Rose, Urban Tymes Contributing Writer
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